Writing is My Boyfriend.

When we first started seeing each other, I was about seven. We started out casually. We made poetry, mostly about about bubbles and my childish ideas of love. Then, we dove deeper into each other with journals, where I'd pour out my heart and soul, while confessing all of my sins shamelessly. He listened wholeheartedly and never judged me once. I fell in love with being able to reveal everything about me without flinching.

We progressed throughout middle school with tons of not-so-short stories crammed with teenage angst and--I will admit--a few freak nasty scenes, lol! Don't judge me! I thought I was being so scandalous in 8th grade. Let's be real, other little young thangs were already doing it by then. I was only writing it. He was always patient with me. Never forcing or rushing me into anything.

We matured in high school with a rekindling of poetry, which flourished in college. It was a love affair that was so right for me. We just fit together and writing's love was always unconditional. He always accepted criticism with grace and determination to make himself better. And our love did get better and it grew stronger with editorial styled writing. I found my future within my past and present with writing.

We have been able to grow together and now, we're stronger than ever. It's so exciting that I get to look forward to spending the rest of my life loving to write. I'm so in love.

Updates.

My brain is kinda all over today. But...I thought since we are currently 22 days into 2009, I will entertain you with the status of my "resolutions."

1. Mary Jane-def have slowed it down, but haven't made myself proud yet. Going to attempt smoking only thrice a week.
2. Fornication-found out it's certainly not a need and it's becoming less of a want. I think I am going to kick fornication's ass.
3. Libations-I did drink on New Years and have had a few drinks since, but I haven't been "drunk."
4. Procrastination-I am getting rid of it. I have transcribed 4 interviews thus far this week and have written 3 stories and have conducted 5 interviews this week. If procrastination was around, I would be on interview 2, none transcribed or written. Get it! Get it!
5. Depression-WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? WHY? I have been able to hang on tight to embracing the positivity. I have had a few things happen that would normally put me down for the count, but NO. I won't let it.

So, this is where I stand folks. Don't judge me. One day at a time!

PS. I said nothing about weight loss for 09, but I'm eating better and have to continue to. I am dropping these pounds and getting my healthy on in 09!

Young and Ambitious.

Yay Obama is Prez! Woo Hoo!

Ok, now that this is over, let's take a second to highlight a few people that helped Obama get to where he is. Or maybe they just get his coffee, either way Reggie Love and Eugene Kang make me feel like an under-achiever! These two men personally assist our new President and are 26 and 24 respectively. Youth. Wow.

Obama with Reggie Love and Eugene Kang




I am 24. I am a receptionist who spends her free time writing. That's my dream...to write. And now, I feel that dream is inadequate considering the moves that President Obama has made and will continue to make, not to mention the moves Reggie Love and Eugene Kang have made and certainly will continue. I will use this as motivation. Sky is certainly the limit now.

Oh and let's not forget Obama's Speechwriting Director Jon Favreau, who is 27. TWENTY-SEVEN?!



If you would like to check out the rest of Obama's star staff, CLICK HERE

Happy History in the Making Day!

I couldn't be any prouder! I have been grinning like a Cheshire Cat since 6:45 am. Woke up like I was dreaming in a permanent smile. HOPE. CHANGE. OBAMA. Here is some live feed of the Inauguration. If you can't find it elsewhere, find it here.

Via the Inauguration Guide

My love affair with music.

If you know me, then you know I love music. Correction, I live for it. Sometimes when I am bored, I will go on myspace and search the UK for top acoustic/soul/blues artists. It seems that the UK yields some of the best vocalists in those genres.

In my latest search, I found Jem Cooke. Her voice is sweet, has a little soul and her music is definitely flirty. One of the frustrations in finding new music this way is discovering that an artist is unsigned/has no album which means, I can only listen through myspace. Grrr!

Well, here is a good Friday afternoon song for you. It's called Endings.

I think she has a future in music.

I love love love my neice and nephew. My neice is a character, everytime she noticed the camera, she would break out into song. The ABC song is one of her favorite songs in her 3 year old repertoire. And my nephew was just there. Enjoy the cuteness.

The Many Faces of Dani

People have always tried to keep up with my many looks. I am just an unsatisfied type of person. I always want and welcome change. Even in my hair. I
I have had a number of looks over the years and I have been very fond of them all. The most current look, long with bangs (first pic) is one that I instantly fell in love with.

I am supposed to be doing work right now, but I chose to entertain you with some of my many looks from the past couple years. Enjoy. And any suggestions for future looks will be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

I DID IT!

Yo! I can't even believe it, but I performed last night. Nerves don't even begin to describe it. I was scared out of my mind! But I did it. I had been telling a lot of my friends about it and slowly, no one was able to make it. Ugh!! I am very independent, so I sucked it up. But it really started to bother me by the end of the day. When Chad said he wasn't coming, oh my heart SANK.

So, as I was preparing myself for the stage, I look up and who do I see walking in...Chad. My heart MELTED. I told him later that he was everything a best friend should be. I needed some sort of support and there he was. When no one else showed up, Chad did. And to keep from making this post about him, lol...here is the one minute of my poem he managed to capture before my camera died.

PS. Grrr @ that person directly in front of me. I was wearing the cutest army fatigue skirt you ever did see.

I wanna be like Falu when I grow up.

Friday, I went to Nuyorican Poet's Cafe for a slam. Four poets performed. Chanel Gabriel, Falu, Ben and Rich Story. Each poet was different in their own right, but who stood out to me, was Falu. She has a way of speaking her words that is so tranquil and not like everyone else who does poetry with that archetypal inflection of the voice. She also has a way of saying things that makes you think differently. Her poetry changed my train of thought.

Sorry for the shakiness, I was concentrated on her poetry and forgot I was holding the camera.

Hearing God's Voice, Something Poetic.

I have been dealing with myself spiritually over the past couple of years and only let church be IN church. Well, it needs to be everywhere and that is something that God has been speaking to me for a while now.

I went to see some poetry on Friday night to unwind a hectic first week back to work. I needed to go. God spoke to me, through poetry and I never felt so many goosebumps.

Thank you God for speaking through Chanel.

I feel like going on.

Dropping Knowledge ON Knowledge....

So, my friend Jade and I were out and about in Union Square a few months ago and this nice girl came up to us and asked if she could ask us some questions about sex. Wow. Was she listening in to our convo? LOL We said yes, and a few weeks later, I was looking around on dailybedpost.com which is now EMandLO.com and I found this...

Two words that also mean single-alone/distinct. I prefer the latter.

You know what I realized today? I need to kill my obsession with why I am single. I whine, complain and groan about it all the time. I know my friends hate me for that. Well, not hate, but you know what I'm saying. Guys, tell me to stop complaining. I know I am sensitive, but I can take it. It's better this way.

Being single is quite the dynamic feeling. Sometimes I feel free. I don't have to worry about telling anyone about my every move. I don't have to worry about how he feels, what he thinks, what he wants. I get to do whatever I want, whenever I want. I get to focus totally on me. And for someone as self-absorbed as myself--that's heavenly. Divine, even.

So, why do I hate being single so much? Like Carrie said in Sex In the City once, "The loneliness is palpable." It is, Carrie, it is! Also, when everyone else around you seems to be coupled off, it stinks! Not to mention holidays, Valentine's Day, any day really...when it's nice to have someone else's fingers wrapped in your own.

I am such a contradiction. Being single is best for me now. I can drag myself through the muck because I don't know what I want, instead of dragging someone else. I'm rational that way, I guess.

A story about some poetry.

Last night, I lived. What I mean by that is, instead of going to yet another party, eating free food and drinking free liquor, I went to a poetry club. Ok, I know you may be wondering about the free drinks/food thing. Well, in NYC--I am sure in other places--there is this network of "events". Almost every night there is somewhere you can go and network with professionals, all while drinking and eating. LOL Seriously. I write for this social website called SociallySuperlative.com and they post several of those parties daily, so please, feel free to check it out.

Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming, already in process:

This year, I need to cultivate my creativity. I need to nurse my interests before I lose them completely. I love poetry and last night, I rediscovered that love. I listened to poems that were so abstract, I don't think anyone caught on. I listened to poems that were so potent, I think everyone got goosebumps. I listened to poems so ambiguous, I don't even think the poets knew what they were talking about. And one thing I learned...poetry is whatever you make it.

It is time for me to stop being such a wuss when it comes to my own work and embrace it. I want so badly to share, but I clam up. Not anymore. I have always been more page than stage, but in Two-Thousand and MINE, I am going to be a stage poet because I say so!

I went by myself last night. Nothing out of the ordinary. I have no significant other and most of my friends never want to do anything. LOL But I enjoyed myself so completely. I forgot what it felt like to have fun without the help of alcohol or mary jane. I like that feeling.

I walked in and sat down next to this lovely brown girl with even lovelier brown curls and I recognized her. I said, Eboni, right? She smiled and said yes. I said, I met you last year at Nuyorican. I was the girl that had you sign your book. (She had a chat book of poetry that I carried around with me everywhere I went. It was falling apart. And when she saw it, she cried the happiest tears I've ever seen.) She smiled even bigger and said, I remember! You made my week!

I sat down and we chatted about performing and when she told me that she also has stage fright, I immediately felt ready to perform. I thought most performance poets didn't feel nerves, like they are some hybrid void of any nervous energy. They aren't. They get nervous too. They fight it. I give up. No more. I am going to fight that nervous energy.

Put 'em up!