Eff Age, Intelligence, Chemistry and all that.

Wow, that was short lived. My walk on the old side with my Forty-Five ended as quickly as it began. We clicked so amazingly over the phone--convos were always healthy and filled with passion on both of our ends. I said just yesterday to a friend of mine, even if this doesn't work out romantically, I want this man in my life. He's different, a breath of fresh air and just fits me.

The cool thing about him was the fact that he was from this old school rap crew--The Ultramagnetic MC's. Yeah, your girl pulled a celeb of sorts. o_O Well "Ced Gee" was credited with making the sample game what it is today. So, suck it Yeezy!

Last night was the proverbial straw that broke this budding relationship's back. After I came home, I went over to Planet Fitness where they had this amazing new $10 a month and $1 down deal that I had to take advantage of, so my Forty-Five met me over there.

All was cool on the way to my house, but then in the back of my mind, I thought, it's late, am I sending the wrong impression? The impression of hanging out at my house on our first real chill time together. Keep in mind, since we met at 72nd street, it's only been phone calls. He certainly had me up on a pedestal, talking about getting me a ring, a house, always appreciating me, going through the good/bad/struggles, all that. He wanted me around. He even called me "the one."

So what happened? Shortly after getting to my house and turning on For the Love of Ray J, he started making his self righteous assumptions. Claiming that since Ray didn't have any black chicks in the final three that he is a self hater---hates his race and all this other pro-black bullshit. Then he goes into why I must have some because I told him that I dated outside of my race. I let all of that slide.

Even before we got to my house, this dude pointed out an advertisement that had a man in a Scottish kilt and he called it some "faggot type shit." Now, anyone who knows me knows that I have a lot of gay friends and that my best friend is indeed gay. So, anyone I date, would need to have some basic form of tolerance. You don't have to accept it, but you don't have to be ignorant about it either. This mess is coming from someone who claims to be so enlightened.

Fast fwd to after Ray J goes off. He's laying there saying he's tired and he wants to crash. Ok, sleeping over on the first "date" a definite no, but this guy is different, remember? So, I let him stay. I asked him before I climbed into bed if we were going to talk ourselves to sleep and he said he didn't have the energy. Ok, fine. I lay down, get good and comfy and he goes to kiss me and it's one of the grossest moments of my life. His tongue tasted sour and it felt like he had no clue what he was doing. After about 5 seconds of that, I turn over and try to get some rest.

This fool then takes this as an opportunity to climb on top of me and begin humping my butt like a horny 12 year old. At this point, I am in complete shock. Here I am, laying here, not reacting because I'm in shock and this guy is still humping me. I ask, what are you doing? He says, humping you. Wow. Straight forward. Crazy how just a couple hours prior, that was what I dug most about him. I asked him to stop, he pulls my shorts down. I try to push him off, he says, I want to nut. He tells me he is about to cum on my shorts ( and yes this is in real time) and I say would you PLEASE just stop!? He pulls my pants down farther. I am pissed and gaining some strength at this point, passed the initial shock. I tell him to GET OFF OF ME and I push him.

He rolls over like nothing happened. I'm laying there shaking, crying and feeling used. I thought this guy was different. He doesn't even ask me why am I crying or anything. He just lays there. I say to him, do you even care? He says, about what? About the fact that you claim to be so different and you treat me like a sexual object. I have never in my life felt so used. At least these other dudes out here pretend to romance me first before humping me like a dog in heat. He says, what's romance?

I tell him it's the time between when you first meet someone and when you ask them to marry you. (Thanks Love Jones) It's letting someone know what you mean to them. He tells me I'm living in a fantasy world. I said no, I'm living in a world that I think I deserve more than just a hump in the dark. He tells me that the "chemistry" that he thought we had was nothing. Just a few hours ago, I was "the one." Now, I'm nothing. Right. You can see yourself out...of my life.

I guess that just goes to show, even when a man is completely upfront with you, he's still a liar, manipulator and jerk. I try my best not to let the next one pay for what the last one did, but I am going to have a hard time opening up after this. It seems like one disappointment right after the other, How much of this BS can one person stomach?